Titus' Birth Story...BRACE yourself.

Things are good on the home front..

It's Friday, so Titus is almost 4 days old. Wow. I just can't believe it. Currently my mom is playing "merry maid/mom." She's doing a great job. As a matter of fact, she slept with me last night because Peter needed to go to work today. Originally I wasn't supposed to go home till today. Yes, that traumatic of an experience. :) She's currently changing his diaper, however, I'm sure she'd rather take a nap. Now both my par



Titus is everything I could have ever imagined! The dark curly hair sends me over the edge! His cheeks are huge and kissable and boy is his mouth huge. He's changed so much in the last few days and looks more and more like his dad every day. Praise the Lord for that. :) Even down to the olive skin. He has a bit of jaundice, however the doctor's and nurses said that almost all breast fed babies are a bit jaundice. He has to go to the hospital in the morning to get weighed and and get a bilirubin check as well. He weighed 8lbs 4oz at birth and of yesterday morning was down to 7lbs 12oz. That's 7% of his body weight. No, I didn't calculate that number, they did. :) I'm not the math expert these days, especially with all the narcotics I've been on.



Moving on, Sunday was everything we expected it to be. Very relaxed. We knew we had to be at the hospital between 9 and 10 to check in and start the "ripening" process. I didn't get cervadil, I got some pill that dissolves. It starts with a C though. :) They gave me one at 10pm and another one at 2am. We got in the room, unpacked our bags. I got in my polka dot hospital gown and laid in bed. YES, I brought my own hospital gown. :) I'll show pics when I get them downloaded. Peter set up his "chair bed" and we were ready go to. 10pm-2am was pretty uneventful. The only thing that really bothered me was that I couldn't go to sleep and the tape for my IV was pulling on my arm hairs! I had the nurse move it once. Then, the nurse came in and gave me the second pill. Luckily, I hadn't progressed any. Still at a 1 and 70% effaced. Seriously I thought? I then talked myself into trying to go to sleep! Yea right. Contractions started about 2:30am. I thought, I can handle this. I kept having to get up and go to the bathroom. I had to unplug the monitor and drag the cords with me. I wouldn't miss the peeing every 5 minutes I thought. The contractions started getting worse. I felt better standing up and walking around. I decide I should wake Peter up around 3:30am. I gently tapped him and said, I think it's time you hold my hand. Hahaha. He jumped up. It was hilarious. He threw on his jeans, put on his hat, folded up his bed...etc. I was like, where are you going? We're going to be here a while and I'm sure you'll get to go back to sleep when I get my epidural. Moving on...the nurse came in and by that point the contractions were every 3 to 6 minutes. Some closer together than others. But, very sporadic. I enjoyed sitting on the ball. 5:30am rolled around and they were every 1 to 2 to 3 minutes. I was concerned about waiting until 7 or 7:30am for my doctor to break my water. The nurse kept telling me she could give me Demerol, but that I'd have to have Phinegran to go with it because it could cause some major nausea. I was very against the Phinegran because I know it makes me go to sleep immediately. I didn't want to miss anything and feel drunk all day!!! I'm glad I waited. The nurse came back in at 6 and said Dr. Wai told me I could go ahead and get the epidural since they were so close together and he was about to break my water and he knew they'd be right on top of each other. I was totally okay with this. I head to the bathroom one more time and come out to find the Anesthesiologist. His name was Dr. Needleman. I kid you not. I wanted to make some jokes, but I was having contractions the whole time he was putting it in, so I had to focus on breathing. I felt the needle but it wasn't so bad. I was looking forward to it working. All of a sudden, it worked and I felt SO claustrophobic! I thought I'd enjoy feeling no pain, however, I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that I couldn't move my legs. It was a weird feeling. However, I felt no pain. An hour and half went by and Dr. Wai said he was going to break my water to see what would happen. He would wait on the Pitocin. The nurse checked me an hour later and I was only at a 2. Immediately after he broke my water I started feeling contractions in my left side. I was confused. They kept getting worse! They gave me Pitocin and then I felt them all the way in my lower abdomen! OUCH!!! I thought, what the heck! Dr. Wai came back in along with the new Anesthesiologist and they decided that I definitely needed to have my epidural redone. Before they did that they went ahead and gave me Demerol and Phinegran. So, I was drunk as a skunk when they gave me the second epidural. He told me to hold out and that it would start working. Well, it completely numbed my left leg but I could feel my right leg and right abdomen area. I was still feeling the contractions majorly! At this point I made it to a 4 and then a 6. Then, due to contractions in my low back and in front every 1 minute, they said the only option was to re do it again. Peter told me I asked the Dr. if I was going to have to pay for the 3 that didn't work. hhaaaa. Well, low and behold, that one didn't work either. Apparently, the space where the epidural goes in was so small that it wouldn't spread anywhere but my legs. Well, I had made it to a 7 and half, or a tight 8 as my Dr. would call it. He told me during a contraction that he could feel Titus' head coming down but that it would go right back up. So, I stayed there for about 2 hours....by this point I was crying. It hurt so bad and I was so sleepy that I just couldn't get ahold of myself. I punched that nurse's button to many times to count. My nurse ended up being from ACU, we figured out later, but wasn't the most comforting. She was sweet, but I think she was REALLY overwhelmed by the fact that none of my epi's didn't work! So, Peter was trying to comfort me and I was telling him at that point that I couldn't do it anymore and to do something. I had remained calm until then but could not get a hold of my crying. On top of that I was shivering harder than I've ever shivered in my life. Partly because of the epidurals and I had a 101 fever. This was a problem! They didn't want the baby to have a fever. We asked the nurse to call Dr. Wai and she said he'd be there in an hour. Peter very sternly said, she cannot wait an hour. So, Dr. Wai basically skipped the rest of his patients and ran right over. The next thing I remember is the nurse and Dr. Wai telling me it was time to do a C-Section. I was relieved, and Peter was freaked out! Dr. Fox gave me the max epidural that he could give me and said if I could feel anything then they would have to put me to sleep, trach and all! Peter wouldn't get to be in the operating room and I wouldn't see Titus until I woke up! I was so nervous that would happen so I cried more. All of a sudden I felt nothing else. They say they RARELY give that much epidural because if you deliver the baby you can't push or sit up. I was feeling better than I had felt all day. We all waited for about 20 minutes before the operating room opened. Peter, Dr. Wai, Dr. Fox, my nurse, my mom, who was crying, my dad and my sis and Peter's parents all came in. Oh and Rachel from Rachel Debell Photography was ready to photograph the birth. So, she gave me some pics of me in pain. I need to ask her for those so I can remember. :) Peter put on his scrubs and basically sat in this chair and didn't move. I kept asking him if he was okay, but I knew he wasn't. He was scared half to death that I was getting cut open!!! So, they wheel me in and make him wait outside to see if my epi was working. I remember then moving me over and putting the sheet up. I remember Dr. Fox covering me up with blankets and standing by my head ready to administer drugs if I felt anything. Dr. Wai took the tools and started squeezing my belly. Praise the Lord I felt nothing!! The next thing I know, Peter was by my head and I was being cut open. The next thing I remember was a feeling like someone was standing on top of my ribs and pushing as hard as they could! I felt it all! They say you're supposed to feel that sensation, but Titus' head was stuck in the birth canal and the rest of his body was basically under my rib cage. NO WONDER I couldn't' breathe. :) I start yelling that I couldn't take it anymore and asking how much longer. They were all encouraging me to hang in there because they wanted me to see Titus before they knocked me out!! Finally, out he came screaming! I cried and Peter stood up. He went over to take pictures and I could start feeling the drugs try to knock me into a deep sleep! They brought him over to my head and I looked and then they tell me they have to take him to the NICU because he was grunting. He had to much stress from labor and the delivery that he needed to calm down before transferring to the nursery. The next thing I know I'm awake in recovery. They had knocked me out because I felt way to much!! But, it was worth it not to have a trach down my throat and to get to hear sweet Titus cry!! The look on Peter's face was priceless. Luckily he brought a camera into the room! I was feeling pretty good in recovery but had to stay in there for an hour to come off the meds. They cleaned me up and wheeled me down the hall, past the waiting room to my regular room. It felt surreal because I hadn't really seen Titus yet. So, I was going to my room without him. Praise the Lord he followed shortly after and was able to come to me!!! I held him for the first time and saw those huge lips, dark hair and olive skin! It was breath taking! After all that work and hurt, I was finally holding him. All 8 lbs 4 oz. of him! I knew he'd be pretty big....
The next few hours were so special getting to watch Peter hold him and then me getting to feed him. I stayed in the hospital until Thursday. So, I was there from Sunday evening to Thursday afternoon. I was feeling pretty drunk the first few days, and then the real pain started kicking in. Luckily I had around the clock pain meds. I was feeling pretty bad until about Saturday morning and then I felt like a new woman come Sunday.

We've had some special time at home. Praise the Lord my mom has been here to keep me company during the days and nights. Titus left the hospital with jaundice and was down to 7lbs and 11 oz. We had to go back up to the hospital on Saturday morning to do a bilirubin check and weigh him. I worked really hard to get him to feed and to gain weight. Luckily he was back up to 8 lbs! Praise the Lord! His jaundice was down tremendously and we were home free.
Monday we went to the doctor for his first follow up and he was 8 lbs 8 oz. Apparently I have half and half. We go back on Thursday for his 2 week appointment and I guarantee he'll be 9 lbs. He's such a good eater.
We've had some rough nights! No one prepared me for the whole "milk coming in" process. I was MISERABLE! And, no one prepared me for the crying bits. Basically every time I look at Peter I get this overwhelming sensation to just want to squeeze and hold him and cry. It's hilarious and awful at the same time. He feels helpless. :) I know people tell you about the crazy love you have for your child, but no one prepared me for the love I'd feel for Peter after Titus was born. I miss him terribly while he's at work and wish he could be here all weekend with us! I'm overwhelmed by the Lord's mercy and grace for this birth story and I couldn't ask for a more precious baby. I'm learning what I can and can't eat so he won't hurt. It's hard and rewarding all at the same time. Last night we had a great night, but mom helped out alot. He slept in his crib for the first time and my mom brought him too me. I'll turn on the monitor Thursday night when she leaves and probably be sad and overwhelmed that I'm not going to have slumber parties with her and Titus anymore. Luckily, I'm used to feeding him.

Meanwhile, here's more pictures for you to enjoy!!!!! Thanks for all the sweet notes, texts and phone calls. Everyone is drunk with love for Titus around here and falling more in love with Jesus because of His miracle.